I am feeling very Carrie from Sex in the City right now. While I am not writing up a column for a magazine from my apartment in New York City. I am going to write about this funny thing called ‘dating.’
The term ‘dating’ is foreign to me. Something I haven’t really engaged with in the past. I’ve been the ‘relationship’ type of person. So here I have found myself in my early 30’s embarking on a strange and unfamiliar journey. It seems what dating consists of has changed dramatically over time. Terms that are used, gender roles have been challenged and now it’s just a ‘free for all’ ‘do what you want’ kind of thing.
Cast your mind back to your parents day and age, or your grandparents. They would attend a local dinner dance where some fine gentleman would ask you to dance, you would be whisked around that dance floor – waltzing, tango-ing, cha-chaing (along with all of the other folk dances) and generally that would be the beginning of a beautiful love story.
Now-a days there is so much to contend with – where do you meet people? – through mutual friends, at a local club where you have a common interest, or these days…the internet. I dipped into the internet dating thing, and I must say it’s not my cup of tea. For me it felt unnatural and forced, like I was scrolling through a catalog of eligible bachelors. Whilst I know many a couple who have met and fell in love online, and my hat goes off to them, it’s just not for me. I would much rather be swept off my feet on the dance floor at the local RSL (see previous paragraph).
I’ve had a wealth of advice coming from friends and family members, and there has been 2 main common things come out of their own personal experiences:
- “I wasn’t looking and was genuinely happy being single”
- “Have fun now and do whatever you want”
Exploring the whole dating thing enables you to learn more about yourself and what you want from a partner in the future and what you don’t want without the pressures of having to answer to anyone. You can explore possibilities that you didn’t know were there before.
At the end of the day, and this is completely my opinion and what I have found, is that you have to go with what suits you. What feels comfortable and what feels ‘right.’ Whether it is being set up on a blind date, internet dating, speed dating ect. There is no ‘one size fits all’ and each relationship is unique and individual. Do what feels comfortable without compromising your own values and morals.
Until next time,
Sunshine, Lollipops, Rainbows and Prancing and Romancing,